TMNT Update: Michael Bay Is A Moron Yet Again!! Megan Fox Cast As April O’Neil

Megan Fox/April O'NeilLet me just get to the point first: Megan Fox has been cast as April O’Neil in the TMNT reboot.  You can read the article here.  I am pissed.  That being said,  I’m yet again convinced that Michael Bay has turned into Ang Lee.  Allow me to elaborate… back in 2003, Oscar-winning director Ang Lee (“Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon”) set out to direct a movie unlike anything he ever attempted: “Hulk.”  The movie based on the Marvel comic book superhero created by Stan Lee.  The movie bombed at the box office.  Back in 2009, I wrote about the complexities of making superhero adaptations into film.  Ang Lee admitted himself ten years ago that he never read any Hulk comic books as a kid and didn’t even both reading any before filming.  Naturally this would make a lot of die-hard fans of the comic book character very nervous at the least.  But even Lee somewhat followed the origin story.  And now Michael Bay seems to be contingent on purposely shitting on the TMNT origin and franchise itself.

Last March when the movie was announced Bay made an appearance at Nickelodean saying that the turtles would be “from an alien race, and they’re going to be tough, edgy, funny, and completely lovable.”  An early draft of the script leaked last year also that was just God awful and Bay has since insisted that it was an earlier draft that has been tossed.

Even though Bay isn’t directing the film, as producer, behind closed doors he has more creative control than the director because Bay is providing all the money.  Who’s directing this you ask?  South African Jonathan Liebesman who has directed cinematic abominations such as “Battle Los Angeles” and “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning.”

TMNT“Teenage ‘Alien’ Ninja Turtles” (with a working title of simply “Ninja Turtles”) is scheduled to be released on May 26, 2014.  As of this posting, Megan Fox is the only actor signed on and there is still no cast for the four main turtles, Splinter, or Shredder.  (Please God, let there at least be a Shredder.)  I grew up watching the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoons.  I played all the video games.  I remember seeing the original live-action film four times in the theaters back in 1990.  Hell they were even a huge influence on me deciding to go into martial arts.  That was 23 years ago.  If this film is released on schedule, I’ll be 30 years old when it does.

Casting Megan Fox is certainly not a step in the right direction either.  I think even Tim Burton-who has little to no regard for story-would do an even better job with this adaptation that has so much riding on it.  Why couldn’t you cast this girl instead?

Over the coming months, I’m certain rumors and leaks will be aplenty and I’ll be here waiting, watching, and criticizing hoping to God I’ll be proven wrong.

Cowabunga!!

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